Q. My child recently had an accident and we spent a lot of time with him in hospital. Thankfully he is home now and on the mend but I constantly feel anxious and keep checking on him. I’ve always been a fairly relaxed parent and I know my over-protectiveness is not good for either of us. Will these feelings pass?
A. It is understandable that you feel over protective after your child has experienced an upsetting event like a stay in hospital. Like any parent you want to protect them and give them every comfort they deserve. However, leaping in to try and solve our children’s predicaments or to make them feel better, rather than allowing them the time it takes to work through the issue and the full sweep of their emotions, deprives them of the opportunity to figure out and manage their feelings during tough times. Here are some tips that might help:
Acceptance: Try to accept the fact that you can’t protect your child all the time. Even if they were with you 24 hours a day, seven days a week – you would not be able to control all the bad things that may happen.
Talk to your child: After you accept the fact that you cannot shield them from all danger, start talking to your child about safety and developing safety plans with them for possible unsafe situations that may arise. Remember, being prepared for and able to assess danger is the best defence against it and parents can protect their children by helping them develop safety plans before they are in an unsafe situation.
